General Tips

Avoid Distractions

Don’t use the phone when driving, even with hands free. It’s too distracting in California. If you’re on a deserted area or somewhere that’s less populated, it’s easier to do. Train your friends, family members, spouses to not expect to reach you 24/7. Sometimes they have to wait or leave a message. Can we all do this? Not really, but let’s try.

Never Text while driving – Unless stopped at a stoplight. But it’s still illegal then I think.

Don’t Fight – Don’t get into augments with your passenger while driving. This often causes accidents. Pull over or put the fight on hold.

Kids – Kids are a huge distraction. Train them to behave or pull over or somehow ignore them.

Pay Attention – I see this when riding with women. When most guys are driving, everyone is looking outside and paying attention and comment on the drive, cars etc. When you’re in a car with many women the front windshield is like a TV channel running a show in the background as you sit around the living room (car) entertaining yourself. Maybe that would work if the car was on auto pilot in the year 2050 but today you’re driving the car. Driving isn’t as passive act. You’re not riding a horse as it takes you for a ride going where it wants to go. The action is happening outside not inside the car with the people, phone, food, etc. Hey did you know there’s a world out there and you’re driving in it? That’s why one of the greatest enemies is Minivan Mom. Pay attention to what you’re doing. It’s better for you and your family if you don’t crash your car or kill your family instead of trying to entertain people in the car or on the phone.

Upkeep – Keep your car in the best shape possible.

  • Security: Get an alarm or a good club. I have a club that fits over the clutch to prevent theft. The clubs over the steering wheel don’t work, don’t buy them.
  • Get repairs made to your car when things go wrong. Don’t put them off.
  • Have your brakes checked when you go in for repairs. Replace the pads as needed. Braking is something you do every time you drive and you want to always be able to brake. (if brakes fail: use emergency brake or downshift with your car and use the engine to slow you down).
  • Watch your tires. Rotate them every 3,000 miles and if they start to go bad, replace them. Sure it sucks replacing tires and it feels like you should ride them until they go bad. But “there’s a lot riding on your tires.” You can put your life or your car on the line over being cheap over tires. California people are lazy about tires and they suffer by lots of crashes whenever it rains.
  • avoid bumper stickers – They just piss people off or make cops target you. They’re funny but it’s not worth the hassle. Some people will key your car over your bumper stickers. Typically the people you see with those stickers are those who really don’t care about tickets or people f-ing with them or their car.

Slower Traffic Keep Right – If you see someone coming up faster behind you, signal, and change lanes to the right to let them by. You can go back after they pass if you are the 2nd fastest out there.

Turning Right – Signal before you turn but don’t do it way too early. If you do it too early people will assume you’re never turning and go around you or create some sort of accident. When you turn right, hug the curb as close as you can (without going into the gutter) so that people can go around you on the left side without slowing down.

Entering the Freeway – Punch it (slam the gas). Get going as fast as you can before you enter at least 60-70+ mph depending on how fast the other cars are going. Look back and left and see and judge what speed other cars are going.

Exiting the Freeway – Try to plan it so you’re not changing lanes at the last second. If you’re about to miss your turn, don’t kill yourself and others trying to make an exit. Just head to the next exit and do a U-TURN or whatever. I keep seeing people doing some insane 5 lane change, drive down the middle area and nearly crash into the barrels to make the exit. Stupid idiots!

Turns – Signal unless you think someone will block you by signally. Always look behind you left or right to make sure it’s clear. Keep in mind your car’s blind spot. Every so often cars get lost in there. Be sure to also check your side mirrors in addition to turning your neck. Do this EVERY time, even, when you assume no one is there. Because sometimes cars sneak in there.

Parking – Never take up more than one space. Try to park in the middle of the spot so that someone parking next to you will not have a hard time getting in or out of their car. (They’ll key you). Stay out of handicap spots unless you plan on staying in your car to wait and there are other handicap spots open for a handicapper to park. Never park on red curbs or in front of a fire hydrant. Unless there’s some special case at your apartments or something. I used to have to park in red curbs to load/unload. -Park away from other cars to reduce/avoid dents.

Bad Car Ride – If you ride with someone and they totally suck at driving, don’t drive with them again. Or another thing you can try is offering to drive in your car or drive instead. Don’t risk your life on the crappy driving of another person.

Intersections – Don’t gets stuck in an intersection being the only car that’s blocking a lane. Wait until there’s time to fit in first.

Stop Lights

  • Figure out how long the yellow lights run. In my town it’s 5 seconds. In other towns they’re all 3 seconds. Once you know, you can take a lot of yellow lights if you know you have enough time.
  • If you’re first in line at a red light make sure you pay attention and go when it’s green. It’s super annoying to see people pass you to get first at the light then sit there forever when the light turns green. -Honking: California people almost never honk, but I honk if the person at the light doesn’t go in like 5-10 seconds.
  • If you’re in a left turn lane, immediately go when the light goes green. Don’t delay. With almost all lights, if you delay at all, the people behind you get a red light and miss their turn for 3-5 minutes. Don’t be a dumb asshole that screws over people behind you with your incompetence.
  • Light just changed. If the light just changed to green, make sure you scan both directions before crossing the intersection. I see people run red lights, I see people try to make the light. My family was going to make a left turn with the van and someone ran a light. If they hadn’t checked they would have had someone plow into them at 60 mph running the light. A year or so back a light turned green and I went through it at 50 mph. The cars on the left and right lanes were stopped and I went by them in the middle. But unbeknownst to me a big group of people were crossing the street and they totally missed the crosswalk/light. I didn’t see them because they were right at the divider between the road directions, and were in front of the car stopped at the lane to the left of me. So I go down the middle lane at 50 mph cuz I had a green light and skimmed them all. I nearly plowed down 5 people if I would have been a bit later. I learned a lot from that. I don’t know what the law says but it seems like they were in the wrong but that wouldn’t have mattered had I plowed them all over. From then on, I slow down at recently green lights until I know for sure the crosswalk is clear.

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    • Sick_of_A$$Hats_on_the_road on:
      Why do California Drivers Suck?
      OMG - I haven't laughed so hard in a long, long time!! This was brilliant, JDP 2005!! I realize it's from 2014 ... I'm only now seeing it. Loved it!! Totally relate to all!
    • Disillusioned_CA_Transplant on:
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      Hey, I'm liberal, but I'm an intelligent, east-coast liberal who moved here and I agree with everything you posted except the liberal part ... they are mostly mindless morons - but this goes beyond politics. I too have driven in just about every state in the Union and overseas. Although most states have their fair share of asshole drivers who have many of the bad habits listed above (FL especially), CA seems to have them ALL, and then some!! Ugh.
    • John Carponti on:
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      I wish that Cali drivers would stay in California and not come to Las Vegas, Nevada! They are some of the worst drivers I have seen and generally make driving on the I-15 miserable. They seem to think that the speed limit signs don't apply to them. When they leave Vegas and head South on I-15 they jam and back up the Interstate near Primm for hours because all these morons all leave at the same time on Sunday. When it gets backed up they act like the emergency lane is their own private express lane and utilize it illegally. Truth be known, here in Las Vegas we hate people who come here from California. Do us a favor, stay where you are and don't come here. Trust me, we think of you as the a-holes you are.
    • Koko on:
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    • Koko on:
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      In Oregon it's the California drivers and tourists that drive me insane, like no, it's not OK to drive slowly in the left lane when there is only two lanes.and one lane is pilled up with semi trucks, My town has been invaded with s.Californians and have ruined the driving experience. They'll stop in the middle,soft he road to take pictures of deer. They'll take up literally every parking spot down town, cut you off on the freeway even though no on is behind you. Use their phones because they for some reason think it's legal in Oregon, as if we are that backwards and behind in times. Text and drive. And drive like complete a holes because they can't figure out how to bet around in a small town where literally every road gets you where you need to go.
    • Miles on:
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      parker ain't wrong though lol
    • Laura on:
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      THANK YOU!! I couldn't agree with you more! I just moved here from Kirkland, WA last July and I'm already thinking about moving back. I'm already sick of all the people here in California that have such self entitlement attitudes and such disregard for life they think the traffic laws don't apply to them. Since I've been here I've almost been in several accidents and almost been run over in a crosswalk but these people don't care! They are reckless A$$holes!!
    • Laura on:
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      Totally agree!! I moved here not even a year ago and I'm already thinking about moving back!
    • JANE DOE on:
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      Hey, I'm stuck in CA driving with these idiots all the time. But you can't complain if you're from TX about CA drivers, although it is the only TX place I have been, Houston drivers are just as bad.
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    I’ve driven in California since 1991. I’ve spent many trips running up and down the state as well as driving in many other states. After all of this driving, I became fed up with how bad California drivers on. I wanted to point out what they do to either help change a few drivers or at least entertain the rest of the world with Californian’s horrible driving.

    I’m located in Orange County in a couple of the richest areas. I see every type of car that is out there in this area. It’s like a car show. Going to a car show isn’t exciting anymore because you see most of the cars driving around anyway. I also work at a place where people buy all the different types of cars. We have Lamborghinis, Ferraris, Lotus, etc. So you can even see a lot of the cars in the work parking lot.

    Disclaimer: You’re on your own with these tips. They are not the official law and in no way represent what you should be doing should a cop pull you over.

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